Tuesday, February 05, 2008

The Trouble With Hairy

This tidbit may have absolutely no basis in fact, but since a) that has never stopped me before and b) this is a total delight, let's just run with it, shall we? It seems Tom Jones has insured his chest hair with Lloyd's of London for £3.5 million, according to the UK Mirror's 3am Girls:
With tough tour schedules and big money at stake, It's Not Unusual for stars to insure their bodies.

So it should come as no surprise to learn that Sir Tom Jones, 67, whose mop of luxurious curly brown hair has made him a hit with the ladies, has had his chest hair insured - for the princely sum of £3.5 million!

Top insurance house Lloyd's of London was approached about the deal and, after initial concerns that it might prove too much of a risk, went ahead.

"Like a vintage wine, Tom just gets better with age," says our body hair mole.

"Even at the grand old age of 67, the ladies love his hip-thrusting moves and catching a sneaky peak of his famously rugged chest hair."

I wish they hadn't used the phrase "body hair mole," but otherwise I am completely in love with this possibly fake piece of non-news! I wonder what Sir Tom thinks could happen to his chest hair? What calamity does he envision? A furry fire? Some sort of male-patterned chest hair loss? Mange? Lice? Dye job disaster? The mind boggles!

Oh, Tom. I would say that your fans would hurl their underpants at you no matter what your chest looked like, but that would be a lie. We all know they would turn on you like a Chow, as Friend of Felt Up Terri R. would say...Maybe you should make it £4 million.

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