Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Abdulomania: The Obsession of Paula Abdul With Paula Abdul

(image via dlisted)

Craaaaazy ole Paula Abdul had some sort of spectacular public freakout at the Los Angeles airport recently, according to Radar Magazine:
Paula Abdul, the braying, oft-drunk judge of landmark cultural institution "American Idol," caused quite the scene at LAX over the holidays, according to a source. Says a tipster who saw her in the Continental Airlines terminal: "She had an insane nervous breakdown that lasted 10 minutes. One minute she was hyperventilating and on the verge of passing out; the next she was yelling into her cell phone in this deep, rage-filled Poltergeist voice. She kept screaming three names over and over—Michael, Sidney, and Leslie. Everyone was staring at her, but she didn't care."
Anyone who has watched her reality show on Bravo, "Hey Paula," knows that this is par for the (con)course for Miss Abdul, who suffers from some as-yet-undiagnosed mental illness that includes a cavalcade of manias, such as:

aboulomania pathological indecisiveness
agromania intense desire to be in open spaces
anglomania craze or obsession with England and the English
anthomania obsession with flowers
aphrodisiomania abnormal sexual interest
arithmomania obsessive preoccupation with numbers
balletomania abnormal fondness for ballet
bibliomania craze for books or reading
bruxomania compulsion for grinding teeth
cacodemomania pathological belief that one is inhabited by an evil spirit
catapedamania obsession with jumping from high places
chinamania obsession with collecting china
choreomania dancing mania or frenzy
clinomania excessive desire to stay in bed
copromania obsession with feces
cytheromania nymphomania
dacnomania obsession with killing
demonomania pathological belief that one is possessed by demons
dinomania mania for dancing
dipsomania abnormal craving for alcohol
discomania obsession for disco music
doramania obsession with owning furs
doromania obsession with giving gifts
drapetomania intense desire to run away from home
dromomania compulsive longing for travel
ecdemomania abnormal compulsion for wandering
egomania irrational self-centered attitude or self-worship
eleutheromania manic desire for freedom
empleomania mania for holding public office
enosimania pathological belief that one has sinned
entheomania abnormal belief that one is divinely inspired
epomania craze for writing epics
ergasiomania excessive desire to work; ergomania
ergomania excessive desire to work; workaholism
erotomania abnormally powerful sex drive
etheromania craving for ether
ethnomania obsessive devotion to one's own people
eulogomania obsessive craze for eulogies
flagellomania abnormal enthusiasm for flogging
florimania craze for flowers
francomania craze or obsession with France and the French
gallomania craze or obsession with France and the French
gamomania obsession with issuing odd marriage proposals
Graecomania obsession with Greece and the Greeks
graphomania obsession with writing
gynaecomania abnormal sexual obsession with women
habromania insanity featuring cheerful delusions
Hellenomania obsession with Greece and the Greeks; Graecomania
hexametromania mania for writing in hexameter
hieromania pathological religious visions or delusions
hippomania obsession with horses
hydromania irrational craving for water
hylomania excessive tendency towards materialism
hypermania severe mania
hypomania minor mania
hysteromania nymphomania
iconomania obsession with icons or portraits
idolomania obsession or devotion to idols
infomania excessive devotion to accumulating facts
islomania craze or obsession for islands
Italomania obsession with Italy or Italians
kleptomania irrational predilection for stealing
klopemania kleptomania
logomania pathological loquacity
lypemania extreme pathological mournfulness
macromania delusion that objects are larger than natural size
megalomania abnormal tendency towards grand or grandiose behaviour
micromania pathological self-deprecation or belief that one is very small
monomania abnormal obsession with a single thought or idea
morphinomania habitual craving or desire for morphine
musomania obsession with music
mythomania lying or exaggerating to an abnormal extent
narcomania uncontrollable craving for narcotics
necromania sexual obsession with dead bodies; necrophilia
nosomania delusion of suffering from a disease
nostomania abnormal desire to go back to familiar places
nymphomania excessive or crazed sexual desire
oenomania obsession or craze for wine
oligomania obsession with a few thoughts or ideas
oniomania mania for making purchases
pharmacomania abnormal obsession with trying drugs
poriomania abnormal compulsion to wander
potichomania craze for imitating Oriental porcelain
potomania abnormal desire to drink alcohol
rinkomania obsession with skating
sitiomania morbid aversion to food
sophomania delusion that one is incredibly intelligent
squandermania irrational propensity for spending money wastefully
technomania craze for technology
theomania belief that one is a god
timbromania craze for stamp collecting
toxicomania morbid craving for poison
tulipomania obsession with tulips
verbomania craze for words
xenomania inordinate attachment to foreign things
zoomania insane fondness for animals

And those are just the ones we know about. I cannot wait for season two of her show!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Which of these do I think she probably does have?

dipsomania/potomania, pharmacomania/narcomania, megalomania, idolomania, and squanderomania.

Which of these do I most WISH she had?

Chinamania/potichomania, epomania, hexametromania and tulipomania.

Which of these does she clearly NOT have?