Wednesday, May 16, 2007

The 'Twan Remains The Same

From Page Six:
NOTE to R. Kelly's ego: Come back to Earth! The full-of-himself R&B great tells the new issue Hip-Hop Soul: "My greatest competition is, well, me . . . I'm the Ali of today. I'm the Marvin Gaye of today. I'm the Bob Marley of today. I'm the Martin Luther King, or all the other greats that have come before us. And a lot of people are starting to realize that now." Maybe this will humble him - Kelly's trial on child porn charges is finally expected to start this summer.
Oh, ego schmego! I disagree, Page Six. Not only do I concur with with R. Kelly's assessment of himself as Jesus Christ and James Brown wrapped up in one glorious package, butI don't want R. Kelly to realize anything about himself except the fact that he needs to get his ass in gear and finally finish his magnum opus Trapped In The Closet. He's still got another 20 chapters left in him! At least!

Don't leave us hangin', R., please. Look deep within your Martin Luther King-esque heart and realize that the world needs this right now. There's a war going on, R.! We have to know what happens to Sylvester and Gwendolyn! Chuck and Cathy! 'Twan! And most of all, Bridget and Big Man's baby! Hurry, before you become Trapped In A Prison Cell!


Anonymous said...

I learned this from R. Kelly:

Never make a cherry pie if you're alleric to cherries, b/c your affair with the midget who's hiding in your kitchen cabinet will always be discovered.

He is quite possibly the funniest person who's not trying to be funny. And he straddles the line between madman and genius better than any other celebrity.

Of course, he should also be in jail since he is a horrible perv. Just think of the gems he could write from the big house!

Terri R.

Shannon said...

I honestly have no idea what the whole Trapped in a Closet thing is all about. It's like it's a joke or parody song that people somehow took seriously, like the Spice Girls. The only time I've enjoyed it was when Trey & Matt used it on the infamous Scientology South Park episode.