Friday, May 04, 2007

Paris In The Pokey!


photo via the wow report

Tra-la-la! Whoop-de-do! Wheeeeeeee! Huzzah! Hallelujuah! HALLELUJAH!

From the Associated Press:

A judge sentenced Paris Hilton to 45 days in jail Friday for violating her probation, putting the brakes on the hotel heiress' famous high life.

Hilton, who parlayed her name and relentless partying into worldwide notoriety, must go to jail on June 5 and she will not be allowed any work release, furloughs, use of an alternative jail or any electronic monitoring in lieu of jail, Superior Court Judge Michael T. Sauer ruled after a hearing.

The judge ruled that she was in violation of the terms of her probation in an alcohol-related reckless driving case.

"I'm very sorry and from now on I'm going to pay complete attention to everything. I'm sorry and I did not do it on purpose at all," she told the judge before he announced the sentence.

She was then ordered to report to a women's jail in suburban Lynwood on the set date or face 90 days behind bars.

As a city prosecutor said during closing arguments that Hilton deserved jail time, Hilton's mother, Kathy, laughed. When the judge ruled, Kathy Hilton then blurted out: "May I have your autograph?"

Paris Hilton was among a series of witnesses who took the stand during the hearing. She maintained she was unaware her license was suspended and thought she was allowed to drive for work purposes.

She said that when an officer who stopped her in January made her sign a document stating her license was suspended, she thought he was mistaken and did not actually look at the document.

Hilton arrived at the courthouse 10 minutes after the scheduled 1:30 p.m. start time of the hearing.

The heiress arrived in the back of a black Cadillac Escalade and swept into the Metropolitan Courthouse with several men in suits, ignoring screams of photographers lining the route into a rear entrance. In addition to her mother, her father, Rick, also came with her.

Wearing a gray jacket and white shirt over black slacks and with a black headband on, she said nothing and appeared serious.

The celebrity case brought an unusual scene to the austere courthouse south of downtown in a commercial area. As if at a red-carpet event, dozens of photographers and reporters lined up at the rear entrance. Yellow police tape substituted for velvet ropes.

I wish someone would a) choke Kathy Hilton with that yellow police tape, and b) do something really, really terrible to P-Hole while she's in the lady prison. Seriously, like Oz-caliber terrible.

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