Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Nip/Tuck Round Up!

Last night on "Nip/Tuck" there was:

One lobster-clawed baby who was having trouble breast-feeding.

One super-hot, sensitve little person male night nurse painting a rather disturbing mural of Adam and Eve on the lobster-clawed baby's nursery walls.

One mom who felt guilty because she'd rather have the super-hot, sensitive little person male night nurse touch her breast than her lobster-clawed baby.

One near-firing of super-hot, sensitive little person male night nurse by jealous, hypocritical husband.

A scene set in a fancy, upscale lesbian bar.

A woman who wakes up to find her kidney has been stolen by an organ-theft ring.

A woman whose nipple had been torn off by her dog.

One use of "Brother Louie" by The Stories as musical exposition for inter-racial attraction, with emphasis on the lyric:
"She was black as the night
Louie was whiter than white
Danger, danger when you taste brown sugar
Louie fell in love overnight."

A prostitute smacked in the face with a heavy paperweight by her Madam, Miss Jaqueline Bisset.

An evil blackmail plot by Madam Bisset against a former prostitute.

The former star of "Little House on the Prairie" seducing her dog with peanut butter.

A dog killed in a jealous rage by an Iraq War veteran.

One married doctor contemplating a continued affair with a not-very-cute former night-nurse candidate and potential stalker while under the influence of psychosis-inducing hash brownies.

One use of Animotion's "Obsession" as musical foreboding of potential stalking by not-very-cute former night-nurse candidate, with emphasis on the lyric:
"You're my obsession,
You're my obsession,
Who do you want me to be,
To make you sleep with me?"

A line that required Larry Hagman to reference his own balls.

Another, separate blackmail, this one of the sexual variety.

A super-hot inter-racial adulterous sex scene on a desk.

A preview indicating that yet another, separate blackmail plot will unfold, also involving Madam Jaqueline Bisset.

Several thousand huzzahs from Felt Up for the greatest TV show ever!


Anonymous said...

Please don't forget about the cupcakes!!!

Anonymous said...

Best Show Ever!!!

Terri R.