Thursday, July 13, 2006

Project FUNway!

So we had the big viewing party at Felt Up HQ for the season premiere of "Project Runway" last night, and your humble blogette has to say that champagne + fattening snax + reality design competition = good times! Overall, it looks to be another fantabulous season--although we all agreed that Season One was superior (in both design and personalities) to Season Two, especially when they brought back Jay and Austin for some updates on their careers. (Austin makes wedding dresses! How perfect is that?)

The first challenge was to make a dress out of materials from the apartments the contestants are living in for the show, and they went berserk ripping, shredding, and tearing apart every conceivable scrap in those rooms, let me tell you. (They were not amused when they returned after the challenge to find their apartments in exactly the torn-up state they left them in. Heh.)

The viewing party thought that lovable Michael from Hotlanta was totally robbed when his ingenious coffee filter dress did not merit even a mention from the judges, nor a spot in the top three. See for yourself:


And it seems that Tim Gunn agreed with us. From his blog Tim's Take:
Michael surprised even me by his exclusive use of coffee filters. It was a “Wow!” Muslin was available to all of the designers for the purpose of prototyping and, if necessary, infrastructure. In Michael’s case, muslin was essential for the latter. His dress was sublime and I was surprised that he didn’t stay on the runway as one of the top three. But there was a lot of excellent competition. Bravo designers!

The winner was smug, self-satisfied know-it-all Keith, whom Tim took to task earlier in the show for being safe and boring by using a blue bed sheet for his material--something not too far off from a nice fabric any designer could use. But the judges didn't agree (including guest Kate Spade, whose hair was in an elaborately baroque updo) and made stupid Keith the winner. His dress was pretty, but it lacked originality or innovation. Harrumph.

Keith also better not pull an Emmett and constantly tell the audience that he' a "menswear designer," because believe you me, that gets old fast. And he already mentioned it a couple of times in the first episode, which doesn't bode well...

Keith's winning design. Phooey!

Hard to say who the villain(s) will be this time around. Ridculously egomaniacal Malan, with his "I was born in Taiwan and thus have a faux British accent" shtick, might be a contender, and I had a personal and rather intense immediate dislike for Laura because she is obviously incredibly wealthy (they show her at home in her enormous and fancy upper East Side apartment, which among many other fineries, seemed to contain an actual John Singer Sargent painting hanging on the wall, which made me want to kill someone, namely Laura, who, by the way, despite having five children, may be a man).

Sadsack Vincent--the forty-nine year-old dad who obsessivly mentions that he cashed in his 401K to live out his dream of becoming a fashion designer--is not evil enough to be a bad guy, but he does have a knack for making viewers distressingly uncomfortable with his desperate, needy behavior, not to mention forcing his model to wear a hideous be-chained basket on her head. Amazingly, he was not sent home on his first, terrible design (that dubious honor went to Stacey, whose ill-fitting flowing gown forced her to go back to her pre-"Runway" existence and try, somehow, to eke out a living with only a poor, pathetic Stanford B.A. and a Master's degree from Harvard to lean on--sniff, sniff!), but it's only a matter of time.

Once again, Bravo's evil marketing geniuses used crafty promo-editing to fool us into thinking there was going to be some kind of huge drama on the very first episode (related to a contestant getting kicked off for unknown nefarious deeds) which naturally did not take place and will probably end up being a whole lot less exciting than they lead us to believe. Why do you torture us with your mind games, Bravo? Just because we fall for it every single time does not mean we enjoy it!

Can hardly wait for next week. You win, Bravo. YOU WIN! WE ARE YOUR BITCHES FOR LIFE. Every time we try to get out, you pull us back in!


Angela said...

HONESTLY, it's like we share a brain. those are pretty much the exact same things I've said to people. we coined Architect as Trans (aka TransAmerica) and deemed Malan as Mulan.

Season 1 will always be the best, but this season is brimming with emotional instability.

Pardon me. I have to work on my application to Parsons. MUST GET CLOSER TO TIM GUNN.

Txbrenna said...

Just watched the premire episode for the 3rd time. Each time it gets a little bit better. I think they have to work in pairs next week, which makes for great viewing/drama.

Dan said...

The rest of the judges didn't seem to HATE Stacey's design, but Michael Kors seemed to have a real visceral reaction to it that swayed them to let him have his way before he threw something. The shower curtain design at least had some originality to it unlike, as you aptly point out, making a dress out of a sheet of fabric, or looking around a room and saying, "Hey, there's a wastebasket! I could stick it on her head! A hat! I could use for a hat!" He, (Kors), kept going on and on about the old-fashioned panties underneath the see-through skirt. This reaction makes me believe that somewhere, deep down inside, that guy's got a really really bad association with white panties.

jennifer said...

Michael Kors is totally obsessed with white panties, just like Elvis was.

da mansai said...

i was with you til you mentioned evil bravo's marketing tactics. girl, when you gonna see the light. you can't let those producers screw with your head. you know the show is going to deliver, don't get suckered by their misleads.
mulan IS the bad guy. geena davis' older tranny bother actually reminds me of emmet. rich. snotty. fuck yeah she gots a sargeant. i liked her coat, though.
vincent is a pathetic one. that whole "i'm lovin' the sunglasses" scene. ouch.
i'm liking the barbie guy. i loved his video.