Thursday, December 22, 2005

Newsflash! Madonna Is a Miserable Cow

Elton John, who just got legally married to longtime boyfriend David Furnish in England, where they are obviously much more civilized about these things, had some choice words to say about former friend Madonna the night before the nuptials took place, according to MSNBC's Scoop column:
At a cabaret “hen night” the evening before, John called the event “one of the greatest things in my life,” though he took pains to complain that Madonna had been approached about the performing at the event. “Madonna, the miserable cow, wouldn’t do it,” he said. “David asked her three times.”

Former pals Madonna and Elton John had a very public falling out after John accused her of lip synching at concerts. “I'm sure he said it with great affection,” Madonna's spokeswoman told the Scoop. “Madonna wishes Elton and David all the best, I'm sure. She's on holiday with her family.”

I loooooooove that Elton John never seems to have anything nice to say anytime about anyone, but isn't he just stating the obvious? Madonna has been a miserable cow for going on a decade, now. Believe it or not, he somehow managed to have a festive wedding without Her Madgesty's Kabbalah-quoting faux-English accent in attendance. Page Six reported today that "Bryan Adams and the Scissor Sisters performed for the likes of Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne, Elizabeth Hurley and Kid Rock."

The Scissor Sisters at a big fat gay wedding? Check! Liz Hurley? Gag, barf, and check! Sharon and Ozzy will show up at a door opening, so that's too be expected. But Kid Rock? Bryan Adams? They seem somewhat out of place. Whatever. Who am I to second-guess a blushing bride's fairy tale nuptials?

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Mozel tov, you crazy kids!


Lang Squal said...

Elton John brings another unsuspecting boy to the gates of Hell.

{this is the caption contest, right?}

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