Tuesday, September 06, 2005

All I Need Are Some Tasty Waves, Cool Buds, A Boat That Floats, And I'm Fine

Friend of Felt Up Michele S. sent me this over the holiday weekend--for there is no resting for super-spies!--and I was hoping it might be a joke, but now that Page Six has picked up the story, I suppose it must be true. From the Melbourne Herald Sun:
Efforts by Hollywood actor Sean Penn to aid New Orleans victims stranded by Hurricane Katrina foundered badly overnight, when the boat he was piloting to launch a rescue attempt sprang a leak.

Penn had planned to rescue children waylaid by Katrina's flood waters, but apparently forgot to plug a hole in the bottom of the vessel, which began taking water within seconds of its launch.

The actor, known for his political activism, was seen wearing what appeared to be a white flak jacket and frantically bailing water out of the sinking vessel with a red plastic cup.

When the boat's motor failed to start, those aboard were forced to use paddles to propel themselves down the flooded New Orleans street.

Asked what he had hoped to achieve in the waterlogged city, the actor replied: "Whatever I can do to help."

With the boat loaded with members of Penn's entourage, including a personal photographer, one bystander taunted the actor: "How are you going to get any people in that thing?"

Oh, Sean.

Sean, Sean, Sean.

I admire your intentions, I really do. They are admirable indeed. But really. A white flak jacket? A "personal photographer" on hand? You are not only becoming a walking parody of your totally humorless self, but also setting yourself up for ridicule and public scorn. Again.

Remember when Sean Penn was fun? For about five seconds in 1982?
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Sigh...

UPDATE: 2:58 pm

Michele S. sent in this photo of Mr. Penn in action, via The Superficial:

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Oh, boy.

UPDATE PART DEUX: 3:32 pm

The NY Daily News says that Sean Penn actually rescued someone! Huzzah!
The Oscar-winning actor and political activist managed to reach several people who had been trapped in their homes since the hurricane hit Monday.

Penn, who was accompanied by his personal photographer and a crew of helpers, brought the victims to dry land - and gave them cash as well.

Johnnie Brown, 73, a retired custodian, called his sister on a cell phone after being plucked from his flooded house. "Guess who come and got me out of the house? Sean Penn the actor. Them boys were really nice," he said.

Penn later accompanied a few of them to a hospital.

Whew!

2 comments:

Spare E said...

The Superficial has a hilarious photo of Mr. Penn bailing the boat with a red plastic cup.

http://www.thesuperficial.com/archives/2005/09/06/sean_penn_is_a.html

Spare E said...

Here's that link again.