Monday, August 08, 2005

More Signs Of The Impending Apocalypse

Looks like somebody's got a bad case of the Mondays, and it is me.

This certainly doesn't help:
The good ol' boys of "The Dukes of Hazzard" crashed past another pair of joke-cracking buddies to the top of the weekend box office.

The adventure comedy, which stars Johnny Knoxville and Seann William Scott as the mischievous Duke cousins, rounded up $30.6 million in its first three days of release, according to studio estimates Sunday. (CNN)

Jesus. Just when I thought the American people couldn't get any further away from my belief systems, this happens. I am aesthetically estranged from my fellow countrymen! Phooey!

Then there is another unholy report, this time from Page Six, that the founder of "Girls Gone Wild," icky gazillionaire Joe Francis, has hooked up with horse-faced beyotch Kimberly "Jen Aniston Is Homely" Stewart:
The two went public Thursday night in L.A. at the Maxim X-Games party at the Cabana Club, where they publicly groped each other much to the discomfort of Ryan Phillippe, Jeremy Piven and Wilmer Valderama.

Ye gads! When you make Wilmer uncomfortable, you know you are too disgusting to live. Get a room!

It is clearly time to take stock and reflect on our lives, people; the End Is Nigh. Nigh, I say!

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Nigh!

1 comment:

chepo said...

Did you ever see Can't Harldy Wait? There is a scene where Jennifer Love Hewitt is talking about all her problems with her cousin, and then the cousin makes a pass at her. Joe Francis looks like the cousin.

In other news, Kimberly Stewart is a dog.