Tuesday, July 12, 2005

The Dreaded N-Word--And It Ain't "Nicole"

Fabian Basabe is a New York scenester whom us hicks in the sticks don't know much about--nor should we. His name gets bandied about (and/or ridiculed) in the gossip press, but as far as I can tell he is semi-famous for being semi-famous, much like Paris Hilton circa 2002 (as opposed to P-Hole circa right now, who is famous-famous for being a talentless whore).

Anyhoo, I don't usually bring up these dudes-around-town (I always get him mixed up with another who-the-hell-is-he? guy named Jonathan Cheban) but the lead story in today's Page Six is all about Mr. Basabe and his drunken racist rant at a Hamptons hot spot, and since it also included p.r. guru/beyotch/possible albino Lizzie "I'm Driving Into You As Fast As I Can, White Trash" Grubman, the afore-mentioned non-Basabe Jonathan Cheban, a Gastineau Girl, a broken shoe, and a grown man demanding his Prada sweater, I felt compelled to pass it along:
Socialite Fabian Basabe angrily spewed racial epithets at black bouncers after he was thrown out of the Star Room in Wainscott Saturday night for being "aggressively drunk," several witnesses said.

Basabe, who's married to La Perla heiress Martina Borgomanero, was at the Hamptons hot spot with his fellow "Cattle Drive" castmates Brittny Gastineau, Katy Benatar and Courtney Semel, and was "well on his way to being completely hammered" by 11:30 p.m., said one witness.

"He was swinging from the rafters like an orangutan, and when security dragged him down he started dancing like a madman, taking his clothes off and rubbing up against several guys," the witness said.

At one point, Basabe jumped on a booth and came crashing down on Lizzie Grubman, whose shoe broke, and fellow publicist Lauren Kucerak. Basabe also shoved p.r. man Jonathan Cheban and managed to knock over three $300 bottles of vodka.

A witness relates: "Randy, the security man, repeatedly asked Fabian to calm down and stop banging into other people, and Fabian threw his black American Express card at Randy's feet and said, 'Don't worry about what I am doing, here's my Amex!' "

At that point Randy escorted Basabe outside, where the insufferable "it" boy "became very violent and aggressive."

Basabe, who had left a sweater inside, started screaming at the black bouncers, "I want my navy blue Prada! I speak six [bleeping] languages, I have diplomatic immunity . . . Do you understand me, Negros? You [bleep]ing Negros!"

"There was an audible gasp from the crowd," said a spectator.

Rich Thomas, an African-American doorman at Star Room who was once a friend of Basabe and tried to calm him down, looked at Basabe and fumed: "I am one of those Negros!" and left. "They are no longer friends after that comment," said one insider.

Basabe's sweater was returned and club promoter Jeff Goldstein took him home.

Basabe was tearfully apologetic yesterday. "I have called everyone to apologize," he said. "I was a little out of control . . . that comment is something I believe so strongly against. I offended so many people I really care about. I need to re-evaluate my life. I am appalled at my own behavior — I don't think like that. I want to apologize to the bouncers. To everyone."

Obviously, the biggest question that immediately leaps to mind after reading this (besides "Is it really 'Negros,' Page Six, or should it be 'Negroes'?") is what in holy hell is this show "Cattle Drive," and is this Katy Benatar person related to Pat?

Naturally, I turned my ultra-sharp investigatory skills to the internets, where I found this little nugget on ContactMusic.com:
New York society couple Fabian Basabe and La Perla heiress Martina Borgomanero are to star in a new "City Slickers"-style reality TV show.

The newlyweds will join eight other big city socialites when they don cowboy gear to hit the prairies on new TV show "Cattle Drive."

Oh, sure, I get it. Socialites! On the prairie! It's the old "fish out of water" scenario! That sounds like reality tv gold. I can just see all those wacky debutantes, putting down their copy of the Social Register and picking up a hoe, or whatever...but still, I am confused about about Ms. Benatar. Is she related to Pat or not? And if so, where does she fit in, exactly? And who are the other "socialites" on the show?

Well, then I found this old tidbit from Page Six:
Even the cold, hard wilds of Colorado can't keep Fabian Basabe from fun.

The Ecuadorean party monster is filming the reality show "Cattle Drive" near Colorado Springs with Alex Quinn (son of Aidan), Brittny Gastineau, Shauna Ferrigno (daughter of Lou), Noah Blake (son of Robert), George Foreman and Katy Benatar (daughter of Pat). [ed. note: A ha!]

Last Wednesday, Basabe convinced Foreman and Ferrigno to break loose. The three escaped from the set into town, seven miles away.

"They went to a bar and did Patron shots and they caught 'Batman Begins,'" said a Basabe pal.
"They all loved the movie. They needed a break from worming cattle and sleeping in mosquito-infested swamps."

Um, I hate to sound like a snob, and I know that in this supposedly caste-free society of ours we tend to elevate celebrities to the status of royalty, but for the love of God: Have we sunk so low as a culture that Shauna Ferrigno, Noah Blake, and Katy (daughter of Pat) Benatar are considered socialites? Ye gads! I mean, come on...Britny Gastineau?

Although I'm not saying I won't watch "Cattle Drive"--as Ms. Whitney Houston would say, hells to the no! I'm not crazy! Alex Quinn worming cattle? Color me there. Jeez, just think of the possiblities! What if Fabian calls George Foreman a "[bleeping] Negro" in a drunken rage while demanding the return of his Jack Spade manbag from a club in Aspen right before George beats the living crap out of him in front of a crowd of fawning-yet-easily-shocked sycophants in riduculous furry ski boots who let out an audible gasp at the sound of the 'n' word?

Are you kidding me? I wouldn't miss it for the world!
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Fabian "Insufferable It Boy" Basabe (via jhanebarnes.com)

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Daisy "Insufferable It Cow" Holstein (via socialitesarecows.com)

I can't wait!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Finally a blog of intelligence! Keep it up Jennifer - Forman vs Fabase - these kids have done nothing and white trash is too good for them....