Saturday, February 26, 2005

Best is Worst

There's a funny article written by comedian Kathy Griffin in today's NY Times about how much she loves being on "The Worst Dressed" lists in all the tabloids. Her view is basically "there's no such thing as bad publicity," which is probably true. She also takes the controversial position that a good way to get on such lists is to do a "wacky" pose or face:
Why are wacky poses such an effective way to get on the worst-dressed list? Because Nicole Kidman doesn't do wacky poses. She doesn't pretend she's a bird or that she's a sailor out at sea. And that, my friends, is her problem.

Yes, that is her problem--that and not having any non-Botoxed skin left on her face.

Now, some people don't like Kathy Griffin. They find her too star-obsessed, abrasive, and fake, think she's had too many face-lifts and is a one-trick pony (making fun of celebrities). And it's all true! But she is very honest about her b-list status, her surgeries, her grasping for whatever success she can find. She has really grown on me over the years, especially since she recently asked Dakota Fanning on the red carpet if she'd been doing coke--you just don't get that kind of stuff from loathsome, unfunny bitter old hag Joan Rivers or even more loathsome and less funny Star Jones "I Married Big Gay Al" Reynolds.

Thank sweet holy Jesus, Kathy has now taken over Joan's old "Fashion Police" show on E! Joan was so incredibly bad--although not nearly as bad as her daughter Melissa "I Am The Embodiment of Why Nepotism Sucks" Rivers, who at some point had a lot of surgery to match her mom's so they'd still look related. Anyway, here are Kathy's "predictions" for the Academy Awards edition of"Fashion Police":
I've already decided Schwarzenegger is worst dressed simply because I don't like him. Kidman? Worst dressed. Why? So she can feel my pain. Thomas Haden Church will fare well because I think he is very funny. As for Imelda Staunton from "Vera Drake," you know the poor woman's probably been on every worst-dressed list on the planet because she's no bean pole. So I'll tell you right now, she is my best-dressed. Sight unseen. That's how I roll.

Kathy Griffin should have her own show where she just disses and dishes celebs. In fact, it could be called "Dis and Dish With Kathy Griffin"! If you're out there, Kathy, you can have that one on the house. Gratis. I'm givin' away gold over her, pure gold! That's how I roll.
Image Hosted by ImageShack.usWacky...but strangely hott. In a mannish kind of way. Work it, Kathy!

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